Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby.....

GLORY BABY by- Watermark

Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby…baby..
You were growing, what happened dear?
You disappeared on us baby…baby..
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe until we're home with you…
Until we're home with you…

Miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there's a
day when we will hold you
We will hold you
You'll kiss our tears away
When we're home to stay
Can't wait for the day when we will see you
We will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
'till mom and dad can hold you…
You'll just have heaven before we do
You'll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little babies, it's hard to
understand it 'cause we're hurting
We are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we're stronger people through the growing
And in knowing-
That all things work together for our good
And God works His purposes just like He said He would…
Just like He said He would…

BRIDGE:
I can't imagine heaven's lullabies
and what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing, heaven is your home
And it's all you'll ever know…all you'll ever know…




Those of that have known me for awhile, know that I have always wanted to be a mother......But in most recent months I have been on the other side of the spectrum.......Not saying that I didnt want children...but saying that I was enjoying the quiet time that John and I were having together...But I was not going to stop anything from happening.....I say its in Gods hands, and whatever happens....happens for a reason. Well....I am currently as confused as I ever have been in my life!! Some things have happened in the recent days that have made me think alot about life....and what I want from it. ........
I am having a hard time to not blame myself for what was happened......I just keep thinking...that maybe it didnt feel loved or wanted...people in nearest of pasts have asked me, what our plans were...and me not knowing that I was pregnant replied that I was not yet ready....and that I was still contemplating If I ever wanted to have a child of my own, anyway........ Since those few days alot has happend....Life has changed as we know it....my heart aches for something that I didnt even think that I was ready for......and now there is one more angel up in heaven watching over all of us....I think that the past few months were of a very confusing time for me mentally.....and many of you know, I have been once again been fighting my ongoing battle of bipolar.......which is in turn is a huge thing that has been holding me back from wanting to bring another life into this world.....I have been scared to death, of not being able to take care of a child of my own.....properly that is. I mean ....John and I are still struggling from pay check to pay check.....and I know in my heart of hearts that I would not be able to stay in my line of work if we had a child......it would cost more than what I make to keep my child in care.....and I wouldnt want to do that anyway....But the biggest thing that burdens my heart is one more human in this world with a mental disorder.....I could prevant that..... Yeah so far I have made it through life.....but it wasent easy.....and I almost didnt make it SEVERAL different times in my life.
But now after everything that has happened....I know......This extremely painful experiance has atleast tought me that I now Know that I really want to have a child.....I want to be a mother, and share the joys and even the pains of the world with an innocent little baby....If only god would bless us again sometime in our lives!!!